A break up is one of the worst things that can happen to us as human beings. It’s even worse when the person who you love or care deeply about initiates it. But that doesn’t mean that if you’re the one doing the breaking up with the person you will evade pain. Sometimes it may be so painful that you feel like dying … even throwing yourself off a cliff.
Sometimes we have to accept it, but for me it was downright heart-breaking. God knows I had a hard time accepting the ‘terrible tragedy’.
As any person who is struggling to come to terms with a break up would do, I started reading some books:
- How To Get Back Your Ex in 10 Days or
- How To Get Your Ex Lover Back
These articles didn’t help me; I ended up feeling more hopeless than in the beginning. My best friend, who was going through a breakup at the same time, also went to read such books. In the end I had to accept that break-ups are a normal part of life.
As a Christian, I believe God removes certain people in our lives either for protection or to put better people in our lives. If you’re heart-broken, don’t lose hope thinking that no one loves you or blame yourself.
I know of an old friend of mine who found out that her boyfriend cheated on her. Five minutes later she calls me crying saying “No-one loves me”. I then thought to myself “Is she kidding me?’’. My friend is one of those rare women, beautiful both inside and out. It’s just that she has been dating someone completely wrong for her.
After break ups there are stages we go through: denial and isolation, anger, bargaining and finally acceptance. I went through those stages too. Most people who are heartbroken go through that too. That is when I started reading those useless books. Good news … no matter how heartbroken we are, as a big romance/love fan, I believe that we just haven’t met the bottle cap to our bottle yet, our very own prince. We may still have a few frogs to kiss along the way. I also believe that even if you broke up with your ex it does not necessarily mean that the two of you cannot rekindle what you had in the past.
I know being heartbroken is not easy, but there are so many things one can do to keep your mind off the situation:
Take up a new hobby.
Change your wardrobe or get a new hairdo.
Learn a new language.
Go out with friends more.
Make new friends (I got so many during my dark days) by getting to know different people.
Community service work. YES!! I said it, great way to meet some amazing people.
Date different people. Here am saying DATE … not have sex with them … that could make you even more broken than before …
Talk about it with someone you trust e.g. A family member or a close friend. Remember … a problem shared is a problem halved. I am so grateful I have my two best friends, Jason and Nicky, to help me or be by my side.
Write a song about it—I know some famous singers e.g. Michael Buble or Adele who ended up winning so many grammies for what she wrote (imagine just from being heartbroken she wrote her stuff).
Write a book … or maybe even start a blog … I did that and it works out for me …
Until next time … stay blessed … Got to go make myself look good for a night out with family. Who knows!! I might even meet my prince charming …