Does absence really make the heart grow fonder? Can a long distance relationship really work or does the distance that perhaps once added excitement eventually lead to a vast canyon between two people? The only thing left is the lingering echo of a broken heart. Experience has taught me that this type of relationship requires special attention and devotion and without dedication by all involved it will become a tedious chore.
When I first became involved in a distance relationship there was the excitement of seeing each other every few weeks. We talked on the phone, text messaged each other and emailed daily. This kept us up to date with each other’s day to day activities. But it was the countdown to the next meeting that kept the home fire burning. When those weekends finally arrived, there was much to catch up on and plenty of intimate times to share in a short span of time. In all honesty, by the end of the long weekend, we were both actually ready to part ways as we had honestly devoured each other emotionally, mentally and physically. A sweet goodbye, a quick kiss and an occasional tear or two and the countdown started for our next reunion.
There were of course the extended periods where time did not allow us to see each other. These times were tough. When one of us had a particularly rough day and we came home to an empty house the reality would set in that no one would be coming home to share your troubles that night. When one of us was sick. No one was there to lend that loving healing hand. When one of us mentioned that someone had flirted with us at the oil change shop, the suspicions, and insecurities would set in.
Communication is a key element in understanding the parameters of a distance relationship. Things that are often “understood” in a regular relationship must be verbalized so that there are no misunderstandings. Two people sometimes sound as if they are speaking to a child as they lay out the details of such mundane things as what time you will meet.
At the end of the day, if both parties have a clear definition and expectation of the relationship, I think a distance relationship can be viable. Should the relationship not work out, at least you are not subject to the dreaded running into the ex with the new partner, for the distance will now be a canyon and all that will be left is the distant echo of a relationship memory.
