Dear Dr. Romance:
I'm in need of some serious advice, and I hope you can help. I've been in an extremely long-distance relationship with someone for the past year and a half off and on. I live in the U.S., and he lives in Central America. I am 6 years older than he is. I'm studying to be a nurse, and he unfortunately doesn't have the funds to do anything. When we started dating, I can admit that I was a bit guarded because I didn't want to get my feelings hurt, and I often put him down. I'm not sure if that caused him to change, but we broke it off. However, he would still email me and call me once in a blue moon to see how I was doing. Then we recently got back together, and he kept mentioning to me how he wanted a motorcycle. I told him he doesn't need a motorcycle; he needs an education and can use the money he has (which wasn't enough for this motorcycle) to go to school. He became stubborn, and I didn't speak to him for a day. I had called him drunk before that discussion and said really hurtful things, but he still forgave me. However, after the discussion with the motorcycle, he broke it off saying he couldn't do this anymore with him being over there and me being over here. When we first started dating, he said distance doesn't matter because our hearts are always close. However, that wasn't the case anymore. I agreed to remain "friends" with him, and he still texts me. At first I thought I can handle it, but I can't. He recently texted me saying, "Hello old friend, I hope everything is well with you, and I hope this Valentine's Day you are with your ideal person. Much luck, I love you very much friend." Do I tell him I can't be his friend or let silence speak for itself?
This relationship obviously does not work for you. You don't seem to be behaving very well, and your friend is too far away and in an impossible situation. There is also the possibility that he sees you as a ticket to come to the U.S. The conversation about the motorcycle might have been a way to get you to give him money.
Whatever is going on, it is not going to work, so let go. If you're drunk dialing and saying hurtful things, that tells me you need to get your own life in order before you can have a workable relationship with anyone. You might be fixated on that relationship to avoid dealing with your real life. Don't bother writing him back—just put your energy into creating a better life for yourself.
Dear Dr. Romance: