Dan, a hardworking father of fifteen-year-old twins, was single for over a year before he started dating again. “It’s not that I didn’t want to meet someone. I had no idea where to begin,” he said. “I was married for eighteen years.”
For most single parents, the dating world has changed drastically since the days when they were single. Online dating, speed dating, and matchmaking have taken the dating world by storm. In order to catch up, Dan joined an online dating service but unfortunately, finding someone new wasn’t as easy as everyone said it would be.
A careful review of Dan’s information revealed some common mistakes that many single fathers make when looking for love online. The biggest of which is the online profile and photos. Remember, the only information that a woman has at this point is what you tell (or show) them. If you’re ready for the world of cyber dating, follow these dos and don’ts to increase your odds of meeting someone new.
The Profile Pic
Dads, don’t post a photo of your college beer chugging days or one where your overgrown chest hairs are hanging out of your favorite button down shirt. A clothed full-length body shot or a photo of your face is all you need. If you want to include a nice moment with you and your child, that’s fine too. For the best impression, spend a few extra dollars and invest in professional quality headshots. One company getting rave reviews right now is DatingHeadshots.com. With photos that look natural and un-staged, the company claims that 87 percent of their clients report more dating success.
P.S. If you opt to include no photo, be forewarned that responses are usually low no matter how well you can write.
Many men make confessions about their past relationships in their written profile. “I was married for five years to a woman who was a jealous, controlling tyrant.” “I caught my ex in bed with my best friend.” This is too much information for a stranger to hear. Also, off-limits is the honeymoon, wedding, or photo with your ex-wife, no matter how good you looked in your tuxedo that day. Now is the time to impress not cause unrest. You’d be surprised how often single fathers do this.
Jack, a single parent of three wrote in his profile that he owned his own business and lived bi-coastal two weeks out of the month. He also noted that the other two weeks, he spent with his children. He never mentioned that he was looking for someone to settle down with or that he’d be willing to stay in one place if he did meet the right person. His profile made him sound like a fantastic father and solid breadwinner but it was a red flag of unavailability for the women interested in a serious, long-term relationship. If you’re looking for a fling, there are easier ways than joining an online dating service. If you’re serious about meeting someone new it’s important to explain your intentions upfront.
Leave Sex Out of It
The last thing a woman wants to hear about is your ravenous appetite under the sheets. Yes, being a tiger in bed is great, but not in the beginning. You do deserve to live fully after being in a bad relationship for years or maybe you were in a healthy one that didn’t work and now you’re anxious to explore. However, talking about your libido won’t increase the number of bachelorettes lining up at your door. Write a profile that will show the much more attractive, gentleman side of you.
Single fathers are often too busy or proud to get a second opinion on their profile before posting it. If you feel modest about showing your family or friends your new way of looking for love, get over it. Instead, find a woman you trust to review what you wrote and give you some helpful advice. Ladies know what other women want. Having someone comment on your profile can increase your odds of finding love in the end.