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“Haiku for the Single Girl” Is Sadly, Hilariously Relatable

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I don’t usually buy contemporary poetry books. When a copy of Haiku for the Single Girl, by Beth Griffenhagen, arrived at the office, I didn’t even open it for a few days. Then, one day, while half-paying attention during a meeting, I idly grabbed the slim volume and opened a page at random.


You guys.


I lol’d.


During a meeting.


At a book about haiku for single girls.


It’s like this author took all of my thoughts, observations, and neuroses, and restated them, hilariously, in haiku form.


Some favorites:


In my neighborhood
Even the homeless woman
Has a boyfriend. Sigh.


Men don’t realize
We women thrill to conquest
As much as they do..


It’s worth noting here,
Beyonce’s “Single Ladies”
Was written by men.


My generation
Has a siren song. It goes:
“He’s probably gay.”


Beth Griffenhagen, get outta my brain!


My personal contribution to the single girl haiku canon:


Who needs a boyfriend
When you can watch The Office
On Netflix Instant?


Amirite, ladies?


Anyway, we’re giving away five copies of Haiku for the Single Girl, just because. (Trust us, you want to own this book.) (Or, if you’re not single, you can give it to your most vociferously single girl friend, who will probably quote it for like, a month.)


Related Stories:
The Nine Most Annoying Things to Say to a Single Person
This Is NOT Why You’re Single
Fifteen Perks to Being Single and Dating
 



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