Keeping Love and Sex Alive

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Life is crazy. It’s easy to get caught up in the details, routines and minutia of everyday life. The stress and chaotic nature of life itself can take a toll on any relationship, but it seems to be particularly harsh on long-term love that has maybe gone a little stale. I think after you have been in any relationship for a long period of time it’s easy to forget the little extra niceties that once were that have long been forgotten. We become victims of routine and although it may be comfortable, it’s not very conducive to passion in our love lives.

Sex, which once may have been relished can also become very routine and hurried, that is if it is even happening at all. Sadly in today’s world of stress and chaos, sometimes we are just too tired to have sex. There are many reasons why this happens, but mostly I think we just get bored and lose interest in it because it has lost the allure and newness that it once held. It takes effort to have really good sex, and when your love life has gone cold, it may be difficult if not impossible to conjure up enough sexual energy to warm things up, let alone make them really hot.

No wonder so many long-term relationships fall victim to infidelity. With a new relationship the thrill of the hunt is back, which can be intoxicating and that can be very thrilling. Before the excitement of the new love is gone, often a marriage or relationship is in ruins. Don’t let this happen to you. Keeping the love and passion alive in your relationship is important enough to make the effort. Unfortunately, many of us don’t think of it until someone in the relationship has strayed, looking for something that inevitably they aren’t getting at home. It’s just that simple.

So what can be done? Are all relationships doomed and stamped with an expiration date or shelf life? The secret to success may be as simple as putting the spice back into your bedroom. If your sex life is good and you can find a way to reignite the passion between you and your partner, this will go a long way into alleviating a bad case of love doldrums. 

Start with your bedroom attire. It’s easy and so comfortable to go to bed with your face loaded up with cream and your most worn-in flannel jammies. If you look at this from your partner’s perspective, however, you can certainly see that a simple adjustment in your nighttime wardrobe might pique his interest as well as yours. It’s amazing how looking sexy makes you feel sexy, which in turn will increase your desire for sex. Everybody wins! Try on some sexy lingerie and see what I am talking about. A sheer nightgown with matching panties underneath could go a long way in getting your man’s attention come bedtime.


You don’t need to limit your use of lingerie pieces to bedtime, either. Clearly, letting your significant other see you walking around the bedroom or bathroom before work in a black lace bra and panties could work some magic. It could potentially make you late for work as well, but in the interest of love, it may be worthwhile to just let that happen on occasion.


Sometimes the most unexpected surprises can be the sexiest of all. Plan a date night at a romantic restaurant that is quiet and sets the mood you are looking for. Engage your partner in romantic conversation and appropriate touching. Be interested in what he has to say and let him talk. At some point toward the end of the evening look coyly at him and whisper in his ear, “By the way dear, I’m not wearing any panties.” This unexpected yet very sexy and thrilling surprise will drive him crazy and he will be calling for the check very rapidly so you can get out of there. Make sure to carry through with your promise and by all means, if you find a dark and private place on your way to the car, definitely make use of it to start something that you intend to finish when you get home. 

With a bit of effort you can keep the passion and love alive in your relationship. Now maybe instead of yawning sleepy-eyed over coffee in the morning—you may actually be winking and smiling at each other looking forward to Act II.   It took a lot of time and energy to get where you are in your relationship. A little effort into your sex life may very well be just the ticket to keeping the passion in your bedroom alive.


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