A chapter in my life that I never thought would end is coming to an end … a nasty, hurtful end.
Let me back up a bit. I met my husband when I was eighteen. He never had a girlfriend before me and he actually stalked me before we started dating. Now I didn’t know he was stalking me, but I did find it odd that he showed up at my house out of the blue on Valentine’s Day with a dozen roses. I just skipped over it and was excited someone got me roses! After that we were inseperable … soulmates, two peas in a pod
Well, over the years it bothered me that he never complimented me, wasn’t affectionate or romantic. I just chalked it up to him never having a girlfriend. He told me in the beginning he had sex with lots of chicks but just never dated them. Well come to find out sixteen years later, he NEVER had sex with anyone but me. I was shocked! I couldn’t believe he lied to me but he told me he did it b/c he didn’t think I would date him since he was a virgin. I’ll admit, I’m a very sexual person … I LOVE SEX! I love everything about it, the smells, the noises, the actions, everything … but he just wasn’t interested. So I found out the reason why … he was unsure if he wanted to be with men or women.
Shock number two! But being the open minded person I am, I let him explore what he wanted…. Now he doesn’t know what he wants but it’s not me. I’ve got an online friend I talk to everyday and cyber with. Honestly, I’m not getting any at home and yes, I know its sad that I’m doing it online but it is what it is. Husband thinks I’m in love with my online friend and it makes me laugh. My friend is in Ireland … I’ll never meet him, never get to touch him, or have actual sex with him. It’s just talking but he is freaking out about it. Well, like I told him, he has had sex with other people while being married to me … all I’m doing is talking. How is that cheating?
Anyway, we are now divorcing and he is being a total dick about it. Everything is my fault and he has done nothing wrong. I don’t think it’s all my fault … I think we both realized things about ourselves and grew apart. He is the father of my children and will always be in my life but that is all now. I need him to move out and move on.
Does any of this make sense?