As we know, relationships are hard, but the real challenge comes when you see your partner’s flaws. Of course all things are great in the beginning, then reality hits—your other half isn’t as perfect as you thought him/her to be. Do you leave and be done when you see imperfections? No, you don’t if you truly love the person. You stick it out and make it work; it seems hard and, as a matter of fact, it is.
How do you make it work with someone who has severe emotional issues such as abuse, substance abuse … just a lot of problems. The first step is to realize it is not about you; sometimes you have to put others before yourself. It will get mentally draining for you, but just remember your girlfriend or boyfriend really needs you. They need that hug and to hear “I love you,” just as you would say it to your child and show it all the time. It’s a whole life process.
Being involved with someone who is severely emotionally damaged will be a roller coaster. If you can ride the ride, then stay on it, hold on to them tight, and never let go. Substance abuse can be bigger than the two of you; usually there is depression behind it because of something that has stuck with them for a while. Even though you love this person, you might have to let them go. It will hurt, but making it work has to be two ways—you can’t help people who won’t help themselves. Making it work with someone with a lot of emotional baggage requires great strength, a lot of sleepless nights, a lot of lonely nights, and a lot of crying. But, I believe you can make it work if you can handle the ride. If not, get off before it goes too fast.