My Husband and Our Family, Part 1

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It’s 6:00 p.m. on Sunday, and I have just finished talking to my husband. I am so happy! This is the longest time we’ve talked here on Internet. We usually start emailing at six in the morning his time, and we finish most days around by eleven (or sometimes, by midnight). And today, we finished talking at two in the morning! This means we’ve been talking for eight hours straight! Still, it does not feel like enough. But he needs to get some sleep and rest on his working days.

Before I got my laptop, we only spoke through texting (international text), but it took thirty minutes for the response. Also, it was too much phone credit. The bill killed him because of the cost. It really doesn’t matter what the amount is, but we need to be practical in these hard times. If am not wrong, international calling and texting is forty-five cents per minute! Talking through the Internet makes us save a lot. It helps us bond more and get closer!

It truly feels so great talking to a best friend. What are you looking for in your life, if you have it all already? You have a loving husband and a good partner who is kind, handsome, thoughtful, and best of all … your BFF! My husband is also a wonderful dad and has a 160 IQ.

It’s so good talking to someone when your topics go beyond the physical universe. We can talk about politics, religion, science, modernization, technologies, humankind, our world, history, war, movies—just about everything under the sun! With my husband, we can share a lot about the afterlife—our opinions and ideas, and even our own theories and facts! Since he is middle-aged now, he has already walked a long journey, and has a lot of life experience. He was once a lost soul, but now he has found me. He could be a teacher! Not for me, but for those who are lost now, like he was.

Sometimes we gossip too, but don’t get me wrong! We just love to share things around us, as we’ve grown up in different countries and different races, beliefs, cultures, and traditions. We also love to talk about our families, relatives, and their problems. We want to help them financially, or just give them a shoulder to cry on and someone to listen to their problems. If we don’t talk about problems, we just enjoy talking about how wonderful it is to be part of each other’s lives! We are open with each other, and it makes us closer and strengthens our bond. We also bring our families close, since we believe it makes our marriage stronger.

I am living with my family (or rather, my family lives with me). I’m more comfortable with them here, instead of just being alone with our only son. Besides, this setting is normal here. We want to maintain our closeness and bond. So my home is not only for me, but for my whole family—including my grandparents. My husband supports much of my family, so in return, I told my husband to let his son live with him, since his son had nowhere to go after he lost his job. We’re a family. We will help everyone even though we are in hard times. As long as we can eat every day.

I want to pass my moral fiber on to our children, grandchildren, and so on to the next generation. I’ve already prepared my ways for my children, and my husband agrees. They are more like my grandparent’s principles, and we are glad to follow them and restore them to this family. Together, we will practice the principles we have taken from our grandparents, and have a family tradition and custom! Furthermore, they will do it with their own children. Everyone will help each other, care for each other, and share what they have (even if they all have a good income—still, I will not forget to exchange even simple things with them, even for no occasion). In our family, the elderly are a priority to take care of and support. Especially for grandchildren with a good income. If they are financially stable, they should be able to pay regular visits and check the situation with their grandparents.

In my country, if I am already a wife and now part of my husband’s family, it’s necessary for me to call them my in-laws—the way my husband entitles them. I should then call my husband’s parents as Mother and Father (or if he called them Mom and Dad). Only calling them by their names is considered disrespectful and unruly attitude for us. We do not call them by only their names, but we used the term names given to them according to their position in the family.

I will give some term names we have:

Older sister: Ate (It does not sound like the English word “eat.” Just the A of apple, and just a letter T.)
Older brother: Kuya

If my husband had younger siblings, they will call me “ate,” whether I am married or not married. Even our grandparents we call Grandpa and Grandma, and never their names or only sir and madam. It is very important for us Filipinos to used these term names to show our respect for everyone that older than us (Even if they’re not our relatives—and for when we don’t know someone’s name, this is perfect to use). I even call his uncles and aunts my aunt and uncle.


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