if i could change one thing,
id stop me from ever feeling.
if i could keep from feeling,
id relive my worst nightmare.
it started with a crush, a kiss, a love.
it ended with a crash, a miss, a hate.
in the middle, the sweet sweet middle,
i found my one and only. if only if only,
if only they could see it too. “he’s trash!”
forbidden love is oh so fun, and yet oh so stupid.
‘you cant see him’ and so i did. those words made all the difference.
you tell me no, i do it anyway.
i am my own master. i will not obey. you don’t control me,
i make my own way.
i want, i need, i talk, i laugh, and it all comes tumbling down.
all hopes, dreams, wishes. dumb fairytales. they tell you such tripe and you are miserably
let down by your own childish expectations.
love isnt real, it all in your head.
it could have been real, if my parents were dead.
so ill be pretty, ill never hurt. ill make my own damn wish come true.
ill get skinny, ill bleed it out, they cant make me do what they want me to.
down the throat, up and out. and go and cry myself to bed.
stupid sleep, fucking insomnia.
so a kiss from my razorblade shall fix me to bliss.
ill sleep and ill slumber, and ill never wake again.
so if you’re not allowed to see your only, if only, if only,
if only, just find your own remedy.
cuz youll be a helluva lot less lonely.
stupid computer geek. don’t you have anything better to do than to read this?