Does the fairytale continue, or do we have to be realistic about how life and all it throws at us will change our relationship?
Does the fire and passion of that glorious first year end up being replaced with hot flushes and patience?
Will the tall dark and handsome Prince who swept you off your feet now raise his feet as you sweep under them?
Remember that first time you saw him, eyes meeting across a crowded room?
Now as your eyes meet across a room it is usually crowded with children, their shoes, last weeks washing waiting to be folded and many words unsaid, but clearly communicated with your eyes. Your eyes – the windows to your soul, reflecting the messages of love, surrender and wanting that you saw in his.
All these years later you can still masterfully convey so much with your eyes, only now the message seems to be, “If you don’t move off that couch I will cause you serious bodily harm.” Still so fiery and very passionate.
Oh! The passion, the hours spent day dreaming about the feel of his kiss and way he made your body feel. Those skilled hands so tender and loving.
If only those hands were skilled in the art of dishwashing or child bathing. Back then it felt like he had four hands when they were expertly positioned on your body. Now you dream about him having eight hands, 4 for the dishes and the others for feeding the children.
At the end of the day when the Princes and Princesses are in bed and you sit down for a well earned rest, your eyes shift to Prince Charming sitting across from you asleep and snoring with just the smallest collection of drool in the corner of his mouth.
Still as tall, more grey than dark and you concede still ruggedly handsome.
Sure he isn’t Mr. Domesticated, doesn’t hang on your every word, the look in his eyes doesn’t make you shiver with anticipation but look a littler deeper and closer.
See the scar on his cheek, the one he got when he tried to build the kids a cubby house and the roof fell on him.
Remember the times when your babies were born, how he cried and told you that you had made him the proudest man alive.
Hear the laughter of your children as he chases them with your stockings on his head pretending to be whichever super hero they like at the time.
Go through your photo albums and see the history you have built together.
The family you created and have nurtured.
The mistakes you made along the way and were able to overcome and maybe even laugh about later.
The secret language you can speak without really speaking, the sentences one can start and the other can finish and the memories your children have.
The next time you find yourself complaining about the lack of passion, attention and of never feeling like a princess, then ask your self this:
“When was the last time I did something to reignite the flames of love? When did I last do something for him that didn’t include a household chore and didn’t remind him of it 7 times?”
When did you last make the effort and put in the time to make him feel like that tall, dark and handsome Prince you met all those years ago?
The fairytale can continue, (slightly altered and with more allowances for our flaws), we just have to remember the reasons why it started in the first place.