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When Your Man’s Wood Becomes a Sponge

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Girls, I’m the Average Guy and I’m here to tell like it is. I’m not your little, “Tell me I’m right” girlfriend. I’m your man that’s going to lay down that straight truth to you. Recently, many women have asked me what it means if your guy won’t “stand at attention.” When the Wood is more like the sponge. You know what I mean?


I’m not going to lie … it has happened to me. I’m man enough to admit it and any man who says it’s never happened to them is lying. So, the question for you is, “what do I do when that happens?” First, don’t make a big deal out of it. That’s the last thing we want, to explain that we really are attracted to you and that flaccid thing under our navel has nothing to do with you. Nine times out of ten, that is the absolute truth.


But, what does it really mean? It could mean a number of things. Maybe I had a tough day at work. Maybe I can’t get my mind off a tough conversation I had with a co-worker. Maybe something happened with one of the kids. Maybe I’m worried about money. I think you get it. It could be any number of things other than you.


So, what do you do? You say, “Baby, it’s okay.” Believe me, the Dude is freaked out. If you make a big deal out of it, you are going to send your relationship to the Ninth Circle of Hell. He’ll have performance anxiety the next time and the next and the next. It won’t be fun for either of you anymore. That is what happens when you make it more than it is.


The truth is that your boy probably didn’t feel like doing it anyway. But, we’re Super Man and Super Lover all combined. If our woman is ready, then we’re ready to throw down. Give her what she wants! What we should have said is, “Baby, can we do it in the morning? I have a lot on my mind tonight.” But, that would require us to say that “I’m vulnerable and life gets to me.” We could use it as an occasion to be emotionally intimate with you, but that scares the crap out of us.


So, you need to say, “Baby, it’s ok.” The next morning, look him in the eye and tell him that you love him and that everything will be okay with whatever is bothering him. He may open up and he may not. Ask him if there is anything, he wants to talk about. Ask him if something bothering him that you can help with. Use this as an opportunity to get closer, not shut down your relationship.


By The Average Guy


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