All of my single friends know that dating a married man is a big “no no.” Yet the truth is, some us have learned this lesson the hard way: firsthand.
That goes for one single mom who recently confided in me about the man she’s seeing—who’s married. “I need a place to talk about this,” she says. “And I’d like to hear what your readers might say.”
Early this summer, this single mom was house sitting for a friend in a beautiful home with a community pool nearby. After work and on weekends, her kids loved going swimming. And it turns out that this man—along with his wife and eight-year-old daughter—were neighbors who frequented the same pool.
“We started to chat one day and it turns how that we had some friends in common,” this moms says. “Soon, we’d exchanged numbers to plan our pool visits. After the house sitting ended, we continued to talk.”
It turns out they had even more in common than just the fact that their kids loved so swim. This woman says that she felt like a married single mom during the ten years she was with her husband. That’s why she emphasized with her new “friend,” who says that “he does everything alone because he wife refuses to ever get sitters.”
So, after many lengthy, heartfelt conversations … she invited him over to her place.
“I know this is so so wrong,” she tells us, “because this could really be damaging to his wife, whom I don’t even know. I only see him when my kids are with their dad and I have no intention of every introducing them to him. I also know that I have no intention of asking this man to leave his wife.”
She goes onto explain that she works hard at several jobs to support her kids and loves parenting her kids solo. She’s not looking for a long-term relationship right now: “My kids and my work are my priority. I feel like this is just a perfect understanding because there are no strings attached.”
She adds: “I’m only in this relationship for physically satisfaction—and nothing more. He knows this and I know this.”
Still, here’s what nags at her insides: she’s betraying another woman. “I know I need to end this now, but I am not sure I want to—yet. This is all so confusing especially when there is no one to talk to.”
We’re hoping that you’ll chime in here. Have you ever been in a purely physical relationship because that’s what you felt you needed and wanted? Was this relationship with someone married?
Were you ever on the “other” side as a wife/husband who was betrayed?
If so, do you have some thoughts for this single mom?
Originally published on SingleMomSeeking