Sitting on my comfortable chair in my living room on a quiet peaceful early evening over the weekend, I enjoy sipping on a cup of chamomile tea while browsing through articles of investments funds through the Internet. While I am enjoying the moment, my friend MaryJo calls me and asks me if I want to go out for the evening. “No thanks”, I tell her and proud to have said no. She said alright and as we are saying our farewell, have a good evening routine, we hang up.
I go back to reading more articles in which I am delving in as I press the ‘end’ button on my cell phone. While I simultaneously click on links to the website that I am hypnotized by and trying to grasp some information on how to wisely invest my money other than keeping it in my savings account I put the cell phone down on the table next to me and forget about the phone call.
In the meantime my other friend Bella calls me and I sense the old routine of girlfriend’s calling wanting to go out. Bella asks, “Diana, what’s up? How come you don’t wanna go out”?
“I’m going to tell you the same thing that I told MaryJo, I’m staying in for the night”. Don’t they get it?
Bella says, “What are you kidding me? C’mon, let’s go have some cocktails at the wine bar. You know, good music, men, dancing. C’mon, let’s go, I’ll go get ya”.
“Thanks but no thanks”. Even though I love to go out with my friends, I still like some weekend evenings to myself. Going out every weekend gets old for me. Not to mention, every time that I go out, the drinking has made me gain a couple of pounds with those extra alcoholic calories. Don’t like those light beers either. Uh, uh. When I drink, I only have a taste for Cosmo’s. They are so yummy and one makes up for two drinks.
But the next day I find myself starving myself and eating very small portions of meals and walking that extra 20 minutes to burn that extra load of calories. I spend the whole week eating healthy to no avail if I am going to consume the calories again! To lose or maintain my weight during the week to gain it all back during the weekend? Not only that but I am trying to preserve my skin from the damages due to the drying effect on the skin because of the alcohol. I don’t mean to sound so shallow but ladies you have to be with me on this one, you know how that goes. Drinking in excess causes premature wrinkles and would rather do without. Especially being out all night, the next day I look like a truck ran over me.
And no, I am not anorexic because I mention the fear of gaining weight. But being almost 40, the metabolism slows down and I have to be careful because I had a thyroid problem and tend to gain weight easily. Believe me, just an extra five pounds will determine if I am going to fit into my size 6 pants and dresses. I don’t plan to go shopping for the next six months as I’m living frugally in the next six months to a year to save money for future investments, so I’m learning.
Okay, so I don’t have to drink when I go out but when I do drink I am a happy drunk and sometimes feel that I am borderline alcoholic but thank God I haven’t gotten there yet. See, this is my point. I feel left out when I go out and don’t drink. Everyone is having such a good time that if I act ‘normal’ without the alcohol in my system and go with the flow that I feel like the 3rd wheel.
But drinking is not just the issue. The next day, Bella calls me and tells of how her and MaryJo had the best time of their lives and how I should have ‘been there’.
Bella tells me, “You know what MaryJo said about you”? I said, “Let me guess”…”She said that you would rather read a book than go out to have a good time and meet men, you might just meet your prince charming”. Puleeeeez. At this point my blood was boiling because I know that that is not true.
“You know something? You’re right, I would rather stay at my home and read a book than go out every weekend and trash myself and regret it the next day”.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my friends but sometimes I need my space. What’s wrong with not going out one evening? Or the whole weekend? Or a whole month? And why does it have to be to a bar or a club? Can we do dinner and a movie? Or is that just with boyfriends? How about going to a show or something? I don’t mind going to a bar and lounge around to have a good time, on the contrary, I’m all for it. It’s the every weekend routine that gets to me.
The last time that I didn’t go out for a couple of weeks, I was getting up early in the mornings, cleaning up, catching up with a lot of things that I put off because I am too busy planning to go out. I go for a walk, the pool, shop at the grocery store, come back, make a healthy salad, and read another book.
This is me, this is who I am, accept me or not, be my friend or not, just give me my space and we can get along just fine!