1. They expect you to put your toothbrush on the same shelf in the bathroom that they place the stool samples on.
2. The only nurses who are hot are the ones who wake you up in the middle of the night to take vitals when you are too bleary-eyed and pissed off to notice anyway.
3. They are so concerned about your pain level but don’t bother to bring you the pain medicine for a couple of hours after they said they would.
4. It is a rule here that even though you have not seen a nurse for five hours, one will show up needing to do something to you five minutes after you fall asleep.
5. Student nurses are not good at starting IVs.
6. “Witch hats” have nothing to do with Halloween and are not to be worn outside of your room at any time.
7. Nurses do not have a sense of humor.
8. Nurses allow the blood pressure machines to pump up to 250 and then wonder why you are so tense and your blood pressure is high.
9. The pantry area is for an occasional snack, not meant to supply for an extra meal during the day.
10. Porn is not to be viewed on the hospital wireless network, especially when it can be heard coming from your room all the way down to the nurses’ station.