It’s crazy how things change so fast. Did we get more than what we bargained for? Everyone knows that I miss the hell out of you. Your touch, your scent, your corny jokes, your laugh. Well, is this it? I have always been a person to know when to let go, regardless of my feelings. I am sitting here, and I notice you noticing me. I know that you are reminiscing on what used to be. Thinking about what could have been. I feel your eyes burning into me, wanting to share more than just general conversation. Look at you, trying to be civil and show genuine concern. Please, actions speak a lot louder than your words. You gotta make it last. Your feelings must leave an imprint in my heart. Instead, I see fear when I notice you noticing me.
What was it all for? Nothing? I would have never thought it possible to care so much for someone then stop yourself from showing it. I wish that I could sometimes see the future. I wish that I could get you to see what I see. Hell, I wish that you could get me to see what you see. I wonder if you think of the things that I think of. If not, okay. If so, why would you? I am so confused with you, me, and this. I want you so bad. Your lips belonged to me. Your feelings were reciprocated by me. Your thoughts and emotions were interpreted by me.
I notice you noticing me, once again. You should really stop. You are fooling yourself. What, did you think that I would be weaker than I portray to be? Did you think that I would come back and find my favorite place in your arms? If you think I am that person, you are wrong. Everyday, almost every minute, I think of going back, feeling welcomed, finding my comfort zone. Although, I am learning to find my own comfort zone. That is a good thing for me. I want to get past this.
I don’t want to notice you noticing me. I want to be oblivious to you and your sad eyes, your stares, your unbelievable concern. Why this? Why you and I? Is this how it is supposed to be? Can we really act as if nothing ever happened? Ignore all the time and funny memories … I always loved those. But, who knows what the future holds. I was addicted to you, I am addicted to you. I am not afraid to admit that I always will be addicted to you because I love you. That will never change. But, we must find our own ways. Hopefully then, I will still notice you noticing me.