I must say Obama’s election has brought me to a point in life that I actually find myself seeing color. I have had black friends, a black boyfriend, a Muslim friend, Indian friends both native and of India, Mexican friends …
You know what I really don’t get is why it is supposed to matter? After all is not that the very issue, the entire minority (now it is the whites I believe are the minority) have been fighting about, the fact that it is such an issue?
They say skin color shouldn’t matter, and I agree, but it matters with affirmative action when once in play and still in some areas, and the fact that we are white, can and sometimes is held against us, even though we may very well be the brighter person in a given situation, or maybe the Mexican is, or the Indian, or the black person.
Please forgive me … to anyone I may offend by my words. I am only trying to speak here, but I never even really noticed or looked at color until at this time finding myself in this precarious position with this black women and I have no clue as to what it is I did to offend her. I realize we had differences on politics but that is politics. I didn’t choose Obama, but the reason was not for that he was a black man.
I raised my hand in a customer relation situation to quietly convey to her please, I am engaged with a guest would you mind quieting down or asking me whatever she wants to ask later and she claims it means f-her. I would never say that to someone, unless provoked awkwardly, and I haven’t felt it was in that sense that it was meant. My thoughts were that she was trying to help. I have never in my twenty-five years of hospitality yelled at another staff member or employee in or out of an office. Loud voice maybe, but never yelling, and I would definitely never use the f-word. I just don’t feel it is appropriate.
I am afraid to say would you like your coffee black, or is it the chocolate donut that you wanted? I find her picking on every fault that I make, saying that I mess up a lot, but what she doesn’t understand is the uncomfortable feelings the situation brings with her that really hampers me, and I am not sure how to solve the issue. I really am only down there a few days or even one now filling in so …
I have been in customer relations for over twenty-five years, she is younger and has around five years, and I feel like it’s a literal pissing match. Forgive the saying, and I don’t like it at all. I do not enjoy it, I like to have fun on my job and without her, I do guest services of over $600 and I do not miss a beat. Well almost anyway.
We have four sometimes along with another younger girl who has taken the train with her, and although a little bit different of job description and duty, with all of us we cannot seem to manage a $400 day, without some sort of screaming match.
I wish to be removed from the situation actually, still want my job, there are two separate identities … but am afraid of the possible retaliation effects from her. There is also this other girl, also younger, she has teamed up with it seems, she is at the other place I work at on the weekends, and she makes comments I literally just want to slap her on. In the Mom versus bratty kid area. I started out trying to help her learn the business; it can be a tough one.
I am a jack-of-all-trades but a master of none! I have managed, but have actually been trying to find the right place for it, I will again, maybe later on even here, but for now I would just like to see the dust settle on this.
Not that I do not have people I can approach for answers, I find myself paranoid from past experiences of let’s say trying to openly communicate. Too much offense is taken, maybe I say it wrong, but if there are managers of hospitality out there who may be able to give girl a bit of advice, I might be inclined to take it. I am that paranoid though and would wonder who ever might be giving it to me may be also.
I know I can be tough sometimes when quoting or that, but it is usually due to lack of space or sometimes time. I am a bartender a lot, you must have diplomacy for that. I am also a winey and foodie and for that you must have the finesse along with the knowledge. I know the biz like the back of hand, not perfect but close. I have just liked to be good at what I do.
I have dealt with similar situations from the above point advantage (managing), but hey, California is a fire and hire state on the site. If it is a harassing issue on the job the answer is BYE-BYE. And it has been more havoc than just for me, it has been for others. Some make it turn around and make it seem like you are the bad guy though.
They did tell one of the managers they were afraid of me, then they had no problem, playing the instigators of irritation, and then tell me if I didn’t listen to them, I would be let go. They were not the manager. Nor were they training me. You could almost say this situation is well, black and white?
Anyway, interesting, isn’t it. Colorblind and now I am not. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Some colors to me luckily are very beautiful and culturally intensive. They must be understood to see the beauty. Not all may agree in the sequences, but everything in a way can offer its own passed down traditions and charms.
Some are also of ultra hatred as I have noted some in previous writings. It’s brutal hatred, as a matter of fact.