I have to give the credit for this article to Linda Medrano who posted the article in the link below. When I read this article, I had a good laugh at the fact that I wasn’t the only one in the world who does stupid things and can laugh at myself. So here are some of my stupidities. Trust me there are plenty more, but no one has time for that many, so here are ten.
1. When I was five, I was very curious and wanted to know how those sweater things worked. This was amazing to me that the fuzz balls on my mother’s sweater would just magically disappear. So, I investigated by sticking my finger on the screen and turning it on. Nothing happened, so I took off the screen and low and behold—I lost my fingerprint for a week or so. I will say that I remember how it worked and never did that again.
2. At the age of twenty-four I was convinced that the “shower immediately after” method of birth control worked. Little did I know, it was far from true. My husband at the time had the same idea. He told me “hurry up and take a shower, I don’t have a name for this one yet!” Needless to say, I had a beautiful baby girl nine months later.
3. While my husband and I were laying in bed one morning, he shifted the mood and we started to get frisky. I have to admit that I am occasionally get loud. While in the middle of our romp, my son appeared in our doorway and asked me, “Why do you keep doing that?” Trying hard to answer the question without having to delve into the birds and bees talk, I responded with the old “I was having a nightmare.” I then told my son that I would be out in the living room shortly and that he should go play in his room. For the rest of the day my son had to tell everyone that I had a nightmare, especially his sisters and other child friends. This was always followed by “what was your nightmare about?” I have since learned to lock my door before going to bed and my kids have learned to knock when they need me.
4. I have a seven-year-old little girl. She is constantly telling me “she’s not doing her job”, or “he’s not helping” when referring to my other children. I finally told her “worry about what you need to do and not everyone else.” A big mistake on my part; she is now convinced that no one else matters unless she feels like it at the time. I am currently working on revamping my answer for her more towards that she can only control her own actions and she should do what she is supposed to even when other don’t.
5. About two years ago, I had absolutely no money for Christmas. With three kids I wanted to give them a special holiday. I was struggling to have my kids like me at the time because their father and I had recently split and he was the typical “Disneyland dad”. He was the one with the income and gave them stuff all the time, while I was the one holding the discipline bag all the time. So I used the one credit card that I had and maxed it out to give them the best Christmas ever. They were thrilled for about a week with all the stuff they got and I am still paying off the bill.
6. I had sex at the age of sixteen because I thought I was in love. A month later, he broke up with me. That wasn’t necessarily the stupid part although it was stupid in it’s own way. The stupid part was taking him back even after I moved on with a DREAM guy that wanted to wait for marriage, had a 4.0 GPA and was on his way to West Point Military Academy. I broke that man’s heart to take back the idiot simply because I didn’t want to be one of the women who slept with more than one man in her life. I actually ended up marrying him, but he ended up cheating on me and leaving me for the other woman.
7. I love to bake, so much in fact that my husband has gained 30 pounds in the last year. I know from personal experience that reading labels in very important. I have done the salt when I was supposed to use sugar thing (my canisters have since become labeled) and I have done the unsweetened chocolate when I was supposed to use the semi-sweet stuff. But, the stupidest one that I ever did was not read the spice bottles and used chili powder in place of cinnamon. Talk about disgusting.
8. Life is full of lessons and those lessons need to be passed on to one’s children. I made the mistake of teaching my three year old daughter the word vagina. She had always said pee-pee for both the part of the body as well as what came out of it and I wanted to be able to discern which she was talking about each time. She decided to make it her favorite word and announce it, as loud as possible, at every possible chance, with as many in audience as possible.
9. As a teenager, I thought I had met the love of my life. (Yes, the same one referred to in #2 and #6) I let him talk me into doing all kinds of drugs. This led to a lot of other stupid decisions, but each one has made me the current me you have before you.
10. I purchased lingerie on the internet. Now, I know this doesn’t seem really stupid on the face of it, but you’d be wrong. For a woman that had only previously bought lingerie at a younger age when I was 50+ pounds smaller, I hadn’t a clue what I was doing. I ended up buying what size I thought I was, which was a bit too small and ended up with a corset with s muffin top effect and unable to breathe. I don’t buy lingerie often, but when I do, I now go to the store and try it on to get the right size each time.
I have, and still do many other stupid things. I’m sure I’ll end up with many other anecdotes on my stupidity. Keep an eye out for them. My kids too have not so intelligent moments sometimes and I love to talk about them as well.