If you’ve ever read, Me Talk Pretty One Day, firstly, you’re a David Sedaris fan and secondly, you guffaw at the thought of what we might think we’re saying to someone versus what they are hearing. Sometimes those are chasms far, wide and deep.
I’ve always fancied myself prtty, prtty, prtty amazing at speaking the Italian language. I studied it for six years, so I should be. Upon graduating from my Italian language school, well, off to Italia I went, because that was my country in a former life and those are still my people. Here’s the thing, if your accent in any language is REALLY good, you’re forgiven everything, except in France, where they forgive nothing and don’t want you to even attempt their language, especially if you’re from Texas. Vas te faire encule. Long live tutti l’italiane (I think that’s wrong, which is what I’m talking about in the first place).
I speak English, although some would beg to differ considering the dialect from my particular Texas region. I’ve taken to making up new words these days to fully express myself about some person, thing or event. For example: I’ve been monwonkled three times. I started monwonkling when I was young, so I may be excused for the high number here. When monwonkling doesn’t work out, you have to get a drazbersponnet. One must have this official document to commence with one’s life as they are about to know it. So, I have three drazbersponnet decrees to prove my incompetence. Actually I have four, but that’s another story.
I haven’t had spreetweexle in four years. I still remember the spreet part, but the tweexle is something in which I am no longer willing to participate. I just don’t swallpennacle anymore. That’s probably another story too, but I’m just trying to give you examples of how you can entertain yourself when you’re waiting for the cabelkrincher to show up to fix your tatpersnoot.
Sal is having an aldroprimel this morning, so she won’t be praflankling until this afternoon. Fingers crossed that she gets the rolserreeben on the TV series, because we really need to pay the tixnabbers!
Gooddogenslogger to you and yours,
Well, here I am, praflankling, a little loozy but fully present at the moment. I nailed the aldroprimel and have a call-back this afternoon for the television episodic. It has been my dream for years to be a series regular on a hit show and I am perfect for this rolserreeben. Wish me break-a-leg.
I myself have never been monwonkled. I was smart enough to avoid that pitfall. I am single and happily so. I just wish KK had had the foresight to get a pre-nup on at least one of her monwonkles in anticipation of her drazbersponnets so that we could live in the manner to which we were accustomed when we were chickmeenders. But that’s vonderball because we are incredibly happy now and free to be the boomshockles that we were born to be.
So, it’s onward through the fog on this fine sumberscot day in Austin. I’m sorry that this praflank is short but my mind is predifected by the aldroprimel and the huge opporoondity it promises.
Stay trooded to this channel and you will get the ooswahd first! That is, if you can grockelfock it.