I was just looking over my studio on my DivineCaroline account and my eye was wandering around the page and I saw a little advert that said “It feels good to write” Those words were so simple yet they rang so true. I always wanted to know what was it inside of me that burned to be a writer. How is it that you can sit down with virtually nothing on your mind, but once you get going, it’s amazing all of the wonderful thoughts and ideas that come out when I write? Sometimes I read things that I wrote years ago. Maybe it was a blog entry or in an old journal I found, but I am often astounded at some of the insight and magic that flows from my fingertips when I begin to write. I was never really an organized writer. I guess in school and college I probably did outlines and made notes and did rough drafts, but to me sitting down with a blank canvass of a piece of paper of a big blank white computer document holds so much promise, it holds the key to so many things that are buried deep inside that sometimes I am not even aware I am feeling. It’s very magical in a way. I believe writing is very similar to art. You have a blank canvass, sometimes you know what to fill it up with and other times you just clear your mind and let the words flow. It is a writer’s high. I get so much satisfaction when I finish a piece and share it and someone says, “I feel the same way, I just didn’t know how to express it” Where do these ideas and words come from? I have to think they are divinely inspired. I have spoke with some very fine artists and musicians and they are so in touch and so in tune with their craft that they can’t imagine NOT being able to do what they do. They find it strange that not just anyone can draw what is in their heart, or pick up an instrument and let their feelings show. I feel the same way about writing. I always fancied myself a very good listener and a good problem solver for other people. Some say it is a gift. I have a Bachelor’s level degree in social work, so some of my instincts about reaching inside, finding empathy, planning, prioritizing and even just knowing what a person’s next step should become so natural to me. Interestingly enough when it comes to my own problems, my fingertips are my greatest therapist. I sit down and I write. I write and I write and things come up that were so far buried, I feel solutions to problems that have plagued me my entire life. I get ideas, and insights. I can rant and rave and have a pity party all to myself, and then bring myself out of it. All of these gifts to myself can be attributed to my passion, my desire and that is my special relationship with my writing. It is a gift that is always there for me and one that I trust whole heartedly. Yes it is fun to write, but it also is so much more. Sometimes I think back at situations that happened in my life and how much better I would have handled them, if only I were able to write down how I felt, rather than actually have a confrontation. If I am mad at someone and I know I can never confront them face to face for whatever reason, perhaps its a family member, a politician, a boss, a celebrity all I have to do is get out the computer or the old fashioned pen and paper and let the magic happen. There is such a release. When I find myself missing my deceased grandmother, I write her a letter. I have written a letter to autism to let it know how it has affected my son and my ability to parent. The letter started out as a rant and a rave and ended with me actually making peace and thanking this thing called autism for bringing out depths of my character that I didn’t even know existed. All of these wonderful gifts because of writing. Writing is my friend, my therapist, my connection to God and the other side. It is the vehicle that takes me to places in my mind that for whatever reason are closed off when I try to reach them any other way. So when I ask that all important question why do I want to be a writer, I am able to answer it myself by doing the very thing I love to do the most.