As I have already written I was sexually abused between my 8-13 years of age. It ended when I had the courage to shout at my abuser in the hearing distance of elders at home. But the trauma left by those five years was very painful indeed. I grew suspicious of everybody in my day-to-day life. Excepting my parents, my grand parents, my wife (she happens to be my friend's younger sister and we were pals ever since she was 11 and I was 15 and we married when I was 23 and she was 18), and my in-laws everyone else was fair-game for me for suspicion.

We were blessed with two boys when I was 25 and 27. I used to suspect the intentions of even my own brothers whenever they used to take my boys for an outing and generally I made it known to them (my brothers) that I do not like my boys going out with any of them much to their being insulted or humiliated. But I couldn't help it as always at the back of my mind was my own tragedy as a child! Later when I had my nephew staying with me for a few years, I never allowed him to sleep in the company of my boys. I have antagonized many good intentioned people on the score of suspecting their intentions when I am sure they meant only pure love for my boys. I can never repair the injuries I have caused them much against my intention.

This problem cannot be removed from human existence by any rule of law. The elders in the family need to put a semblance of morality in their youngsters, and should keep an eagle eye on happenings at home and in the neighbourhood. I would suggest to the traumatised boys and girls of my ilk, to get on with their lives by forgiving the perpetrators of their horrendous act. After all what else can we do?