Family all around, sniffling throughout the house…people whispering about…
They think I can’t hear them as they speak of my illness, as they speak of my soon to be passing…
I lay here reflecting on past things…trying to keep all the memories in the right order…did I make peace with all I wronged? Is there someone out there I should seek forgiveness? Did I remember to pay my tithes…help my neighbors during hard times?
I never dreamed I’d die in this place….my home; where I raised my family is where I wanted to stay.
I’m cold, tired and weak…darkness closing in around me…a sigh as I take my last breath…
Darkness to light…here comes death.
I looked forward to the days I’d get a senior discount! Just didn’t figure it’d come so soon…
We celebrated our fiftieth…yeah fifty years of being bride and groom.
All our kids are grown and on their own with their homes filled with children and laughter…
As if they’re without a care in the world or things that matter.
We worked all the years to get our pension…many sleepless nights and moments of tension.
Now the things my spouse and I share…is something called Medicaid and Medicare.
It’s like we started life over and now have the time to do all we set out to do…long vacations, a cruise here and there, to moon light walks to having coffee in the morning due.
Our days of going are now gone…today our kids move us to a new home.
Four years in college and still unsure of what I want to do. Late night parties and friends galore…
I’m not thinking of my future anymore. I have a lifetime to go and live my life…to work, to party then one day find a wife.
A few years out of college came the day we wed…so many happy memories, nothing to dread.
Many years later we had a house full of kids…enjoying all anyone can do…to the things we did.
High school were the best years by far….all the fun things to by first new car….all the sports…friends and dances….to all the rejections then the wonderful chances. Experimenting with things I shouldn’t, testing my dad and mom to the brinks…pushing them to the edge! Riding dirt bikes and seeing who could get the closet to the ledge.
Just yesterday it seems we were in Junior High and not too far from middle and elementary…riding in the back seat stretching my neck to take in all I could see.
I’m small and recently learned to potty by myself…learned to clean my room and put the toys away on the shelf.
My dad is outside working on the car while my mom is inside baking my favorite foods…I am playing with my baby sister listening to her chuckles and coos.
I’m lying in this bed looking up at the dancing stars…I hear light music which makes my eyes heavy…
I just got home from the hospital in my dad’s old Chevy.
It’s dark in this place as I can’t yet open my eyes…I hear noises and people talking…not sure what they say….something about me and my arrival day.
This place is my comfort….my refuge here deep inside…what’s this? Movement…noise…I’m being pulled out to let out a mad cry!