Let's start off strong here: Take a sip every time a voice-over says something cliche about love. Examples: "captured America's hearts," "she'll have to kiss a lot of frogs," "prince charming." You might be tipsy before the opening credits are over.
Take a shot to get through the inevitable re-hashing of Emily’s late fiance and father of her child. Make it a double if it it involves a photo montage set to music.
Take a big gulp every time you cringe with embarrassment during the awkward introductions.
Someone wears a beige suit tonight: two gulps, my friend.
Go ahead and top off your glass whenever Chris Harrison enters the room to deliver one of the three lines he'll say for the next eight weeks.
Take a sip when more than one bachelor at a time feigns interest in Emily’s words.
Take a sip anytime Emily receives a gift. Take a shot when she is given this breast implant/ ugly egg statue (?).
References to former bachelor and present sleaze Brad Womack deserve two sips.
ABC cast a man of color this season. POP CHAMPAGNE if he gets a rose.
This gentleman brings custom bobble-heads. Take a shot!