I'm a detox dabbler. I love the promise of a clean slate, of feeling like this time I will wake up a vegan! Sometimes I lose weight, sometimes not. My skin always looks amazing, and I am invariably tired, light-headed, and cranky for the duration of the detox. I do the Master Cleanse  from time to time—usually for two of the prescribed ten days. I’ve had a colonic, which really deserves its own post. And when Gwyneth Paltrow shared her detox diet on GOOP , I downloaded her menu plan and purchased some agave nectar and embarked on one of the more excruciating weeks of my life. (My guess is that if a personal chef had made the broccoli soup for me, it would've tasted more like pizza.)
After hearing about a much more quick-and-dirty detox treatment, I booked an appointment for an ionic foot cleanse at a local spa. During this half-hour treatment, you place your feet in a basin of clean water. A small device in the bowl generates a mild electrical current that attracts the negative ions—or toxins—in your body and pulls them out through your feet through osmosis. Or something like that. Within two minutes, the water in the bowl turned brown, and not because my feet were dirty. After thirty minutes, it was darker and had developed an algae-like film. According to the manufacturer of the IonCleanse Foot Bath , brown water indicates a purification of my liver and lymphatic system—proof that I love my champagne. Colors I didn’t see: black, which signifies heavy metals in the system (common for people with tattoos), or blue, which equates to kidney stress.
If I continued with the recommended number of sessions (a whopping fourteen, every other day), eventually the water in my bowl would be completely clear. While I was energized after the treatment, the results are too intangible for me to commit to regular treatments. It turns out I need a bit of deprivation and misery to feel like a detox is actually working.
To find an IonCleanse practitioner in your area, search by zip code here .
Read more of Elizabeth’s musings at Beauty Bets .