Frustrated and Sad

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I'm in a church with a group. I notice that there was an old man in charge of us. We're in a room where we can donate money. I want to donate but there's some confusion. In the end I didn't donate. During this confusion the old man and group left me. I went to find them, and entered a room. I see food laying on the tables. I see my group at the furthest of the room. I was going to grab food and sit with them but I didn't grab it because I felt I didn't deserve food maybe because I wasn't able to donate. I went to them and see they were about to start lunch and the old man is praying. I missed half the prayer. I recognized my friend and went to her. I went to sit at an area without food( like I said I felt I didn't deserve it) which was across from my friend. I'm so sad no one understands me. In my head I'm bursting out crying 'WHY DON'T THEY UNDERSTAND ME?' My friend see that I'm sad and down and lectured me. I cried because I was so sad and frustrated. I tell her even if I speak, no one will understand.

Why was I in a church crying?

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