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Pregnant and Hurt!

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In my dream, my boyfriend of six years had befriended another man of his age (thirty-three), and we lived in a college sort of town.

I had a room to myself, and he was to be there with me, but he wasn’t. Instead, I could vividly hear him cheating on me not by sound but by using detailed words.

Later, I was at a local grocery store I knew, and I found him looking at boxes on a high shelf. They were red and black in color. I confronted him, and he told me yes he had cheated on me and also it was not with one woman, but three.

I became pregnant. An unknown girl I thought was my friend, I disclosed this information to, and then later she was also pregnant, sleeping with my boyfriend.

The cashier at the familiar grocery store was a girl I knew, and she vividly told me that she had slept with my boyfriend. I would continue to go out to my vehicle, which was not like the vehicle I really own, it was much nicer … I would drive incredibly crazy weaving in and out of traffic. I would return to the grocery store, where he and his new friend always were, and I would push the items off the shelves, screaming and angry, and so upset … I would cry. I kept buying things every time I went to the store, but the only thing I can remember buying was cigarettes, and I was pregnant in my dream!

I returned to the room where I was staying which was beautiful and placed pictures that I do really own of us in boxes, as I was going to leave him, however, I would keep returning to the grocery store.

To my shock, he didn’t care about me at all; in fact, he threatened to take the baby from me.

In reality, I have been unfaithful three times, and he knows of all of these incidents where we were having problems. He has also been unfaithful, only once, but it hurt me so badly. I was showing vindictive behavior and enrolled my self in counseling where I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety.

I cannot see him doing this in real life, he is very shy, but now I am realizing how much I have hurt him in the past.

I woke not knowing where I was, and couldn’t shake the dream; it was disturbing and vivid.

The weirdest part was when I awoke, I was depressed, and anxious, and also so mad at him.

In the dream I also left him, my best friend was there and was so happy, as she would be in reality as well.

When I awoke, I realized an overwhelming sense that I couldn’t leave him even if I wanted to.

What does this mean?

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