Heavenly Father,
I come to you today with great worry and concern. I feel discombobulated and frankly, completely outdone. The things you have shown me throughout this course of life have triggered feelings inside of me I no longer can disguise. Albeit I do not have your address, I know if I post these words on-line, you’ll take some time and read what’s on my mind.
So as I pour my heart out to you, I pray you deliver me from this pain, and destroy the evil demons trying to drive me insane. See what boggles me the most is the things I have learned, some of them have been understandable, but the rest, I cannot seem to overcome. Like the wisdom in the scriptures, supposedly meant to set me free, but somehow has placed me in bondage and keeps me from being me.
Yeah, I know, I’m justified by faith, or so the scripture reads. “Therefore I conclude that a man is justified by faith without the deeds of the law.” Romans 3: 28. But for some strange reason everyone does not interpret your words the same. Why would you inflict such confusion upon humankind; and then send angels to earth and force them to prey into our minds?
“For God is not the author of confusion, but peace, as in all churches of the saints.” I Corinthians 14:33, but then there’s a scripture that tells me, “… for there is no respect of persons with God,” which can be found in Romans 2:11. And least I forget to shine some light on this, “All flesh is not the same flesh: but there is one kind of flesh of men, another flesh of beast, another of fishes, and another of birds. There are also celestial bodies and bodies terrestrial: but the glory of the celestial in one, and the glory of the terrestrial is another.” I Corinthians 15: 39 and 40.
Reading this one, I cannot escape the day I saw my heavenly brother displaying a foretold vision on his half designed face; quickly I knew it was you who sent him my way, to declare your presence and to assure me everything would be okay. But somehow after we departed, things seemed to go bad, my life took a quick turn and has been full of darkness, which I’m praying will soon pass.
Then there’s this other problem I am experiencing with my Muslim brothers, who frown down upon me for glorying in my fleshly activities. I cannot escape the pleasure you bestowed upon me, that makes me feel wonderful when I experience sexual ecstasy. Maybe I shouldn’t feel I have the right to speak my mind, but somehow I believe you can hear me as I type each and every line.
I have also been wondering what you want me to do, about this civil complaint you forced me to pursue? I cannot escape the scripture that teaches me—every man must seek first the kingdom of God, but do you still want me to force this issue and uncover my beloved brother’s wicked lies?
Trying to be Mr. Perfect, is something I cannot do, this is why I wanted to send this letter to you. I felt by telling you the truth, you would over look my past, destroy my imperfections, and smirk before you belted out in a thundering laugh.
I even thought you’d have sympathy and say, “Oh, just don’t hurt yourself,” but what people tell me, your one scary ole’ mess. Not in an ugly manner, no, they say you’re really cute. I’m even told you get really upset when people try to out smart you. Believe me that is not what I intend to do; I just needed to express what I am going through.
Luckily I discovered the treasure in the wisdom of words; doing so has helped me enhance my speech, another gift of yours … quite unique. Yet another beauty of life, but for some reason I can’t seem to get mine right.
Fortunately, I have faith, even though I still get confused, but that’s the glory of being your child, I can always turn to you. So when you get this letter, please know I miss your touch. Oh, yeah, I mustn’t forget—people are starting to doubt you exist. You need to fix this.
Okay, I know, I’m babbling; therefore, I must close. But whenever you get some time, drop me a few lines, reassuring me all is well. And by the way, let me know if I’m on your list of those heading straight to hell. Thank you once again for shining your light on me; forever yours, confused as can be.
Sincerely,
Bradley Fowler
