Human Doings

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Several years ago, I got into a habit of going over all of the things I did that day. What I didn’t notice immediately with this practice was that I was really justifying to myself whether or not my accomplishments were worthy of my day or not. What I was really getting at was whether I was worthy or not.

Of course, there is nothing inherently wrong with reviewing our day when it is over. However, a day spend resting, reflecting, or integrating is no less a day well spent than a day during which we’ve accomplished all of our “to dos.”

While it certainly deserves acknowledgment that most of us, perhaps especially we parents, have by 9:00 a.m., showered, and dressed, made breakfast for ourselves, and our children, gotten them dressed, made lunches, fielded phone calls and emails, fed the dog, made the beds, emptied, and loaded the dishwasher, driven the children to school, taken out the trash, and begun work. Moreover, this too is just a partial list and is not really reflective of all the nuances that actually take place in the morning such as refereeing arguments between children and locating missing homework folders.

Many of us are tempted to muscle our way through life without stopping to breathe and reflect. The world applauds our efforts to be super women and men. Dropping out of obligations that no longer make sense for us are rarely celebrated. Vegging out on our hammock for several hours is not appreciated by a world, which only recognizes efforts that can be systematically delineated with paper and pen.

Some of us maybe afraid to stop because of what we may have to face. Maybe we are on the wrong track and don’t want to be alone with emotions that will reinforce that fear. It is amazing how far off track we can get if we don’t stop and reflect. We may gain a great deal of weight, train for years in a field we aren’t really passionate about, or muffle a call to take on a sacred endeavor. To not stop to ponder and smell the roses almost always proves to be false economy.
Possibly, especially if you are a woman, you’re doing a great deal without realizing it. I have to smile when I think of the approbation that Fred Astaire received for his dancing when his lesser appreciated dance partner Ginger Rogers did everything Astaire did but backwards and in high heels.

If you are being called to slow down, relax, or rest, then do so. You value is inherent. It isn’t based on what you can do or what you can accomplish. Take this opportunity to chill out, put your feet up, and just be.


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