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I Know I am a Mom

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I know I am a mom. I have a daily routine. I am up at 5:30 a.m. every morning, and get myself and my two boys, ages three and five, ready for school and the day. I know I am a mom. I cook dinner every night, do laundry every day, and clean my house at least several times a day. I know I am a mom. I do bath time every night, read bedtime stories, and have a bedtime routine. I know I am a mom. I play with my boys every day on top of this. I know I am a mom, or do I?

Sometimes I feel inundated by my job as a mom: too much to do, too little time. Other times, I feel I am not doing anything and that my boredom is always how it is going to be be. Yet other times I feel frustrated after a day where I power struggle with the boys all day and bedtime is still a long haul off. Does anyone know what I am talking about? The drudgeries of motherhood. Does it mean anything at all, or is it useless? Well the Lord answered these questions for me in a trip to Newport, Oregon this last spring break.

I decided to take the kids to Newport, Oregon this last March for spring break. I made grand plans for the entire trip: the aquarium, a zoo trip, visits on the beach, and a whale watching ride to match the large oceanside view we had in our room. Ecstatic, I drove the nine hours to Newport ready for my vacation. Little did I know the Lord had different plans for me, and how different they were from mine!

It rained the entire three days we were at Newport. And I mean torrential downpours. Enough to have our whale watching tour canceled, our zoo trip a wet disaster, our aquarium trip and lighthouses touring more of a run to stay dry rather than enjoy the scenery. I was so upset and discouraged, I didn't know what to do. I decided to spend the last day with my boys on the beach, rain or shine.

We traipsed the ninety-two downhill steps to the resort beach in the rain, and it was beautiful. The waves were hitting the ocean in such a way that the sound soothed my soul. Watching the waves on the ocean in the rain created little rainbows out at sea. It was truly a breathtaking moment, and as I was taking it all in, I felt a tiny tug on my pants. It was my three year old, who looked up at me and said " Mommy, I love you as big as the ocean!!! THANK YOU!!!"

I looked down into the beautiful face of my three year old, and tears welled my eyes. I was a mom, yes.But being a mom was so much more than the druderies of the day. Being a mom meant giving every inch of myself selflessly, and nurturing my boys for moments such as these. Looking into my three year old's eyes, I became acutely aware of what my maker wanted me to see: that everything I do effects my boys. From the drudgery of housework to cuddling with them, they take it all in. And just because they do not say it all the time, does not mean they are not thankful.

Overwhelmed by emotion, I grabbed my three year old tight and said, "I love you bigger than the ocean. Let's go play." I was instantaneously wrapped up in playing with my boys and getting dirty on the beach. Looking back at it, it was the best day of our entire trip. The boys and I playing in God's haven, knowing He was there watching us too.


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