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From My Journal

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I went to bed pretty early last night after an exhausting day at the cardiologist’s office. I needed a pacemaker check and my annual echocardiogram. With my cold, and once I got home, you’d think I would have slept like a rock. Well, from 6:30 p.m. to 6:30 a.m., I tossed and turned, trying all the while to not look at the clock. My fingers are barely walking properly on this keyboard. But a new story is long overdue and it’s definitely been brewing.

Awhile back my old laptop crashed. Well, so do cars, my thirty-two-year-old son said as I tried to make peace with the whole ordeal. Such is the tricky thing about modern technology. If they could invent something that didn’t crash, it would be amazing. So I’m using my beautiful new HP purple laptop that arrived about a week before they said it would. Well, it turns out that I had to return that laptop because of defects and forgot about this story. I’m now using the one that crashed and in the meantime, this website forgot about me as I had to change my password for them to let me into my studio. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about my life. Not soul searching. I don’t know what this is called. I seem to see things that other people don’t. One year I moved from a mountain town to Denver and woke up at 3:30 in the morning to see a ghost that had lived in the town where I came from. All that way to see me? Yes, we’d become friends, but . . .

In June of 2010, we threw my mom’s ashes into Puget Sound off of our dear friends’ boat and I saw a golden eagle fly up out of the water right behind the boat and no one else saw it, why I’ll never know. I remember watching it fly towards heaven and then it was gone. And I knew my mom was going to arrive at the Pearly Gates in magnificent class. On eagle’s wings.
At 4:30 this morning, I walked out of the bathroom and into a living room full of Menehunes, about fifteen of them or so, just having a party. The room was all decorated. Yes, they were having a blast. One was sitting high on top of the standing lamp and it winked at me. Itty, bitty tiny little people one to two feet high known to have been part of the islands for centuries who live in the woods, and whose magic is extremely sophisticated. They were here long before we arrived. The islanders also said that if you command them to leave, then they were supposed to leave, but for six long years they ignored my commands. They were wearing grass skirts. And then just like that, like the golden eagle, they were gone. I immediately woke Larry up and he said they were having a party to say goodbye to me, and that they weren’t going to hurt me anymore. They’ve been known to let little children see them, but not usually adults. For years I thought of them as evil and hated the torment they put me through. Unfortunately, I was to the point that I hated them.


For the last several months, I tried not to focus on my hatred for them. (Though I was very angry at God for not helping me to get them out of my life, and it affected my spirituality in a negative way. I’d learned that they were industrious, loving beings who loved to cause mayhem. Actually, I did already know that through my own research, but I was convinced that they were dark entities.)

On this new day as I write feeling reborn with new love in my heart, I sit back and reflect on these experiences. There was the golden eagle that no one else saw. And the Menehunes. I sent them off with love and I thanked God for the challenge. I also feel it was a real treat to get to see them. I feel my mom’s love and presence. Life is good.


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