The lady on the phone tells me it’s important to get this procedure done right away. I told her I was leaving out of town the following week for two weeks. I ask to see the doctor tomorrow or the following day. She suggests I go the day of my trip. So, let me get this straight—I should get a procedure that will indicate whether I have cancer or not, on the day of my vacation! What’s wrong with that picture?
Lucky for me, my plane takes off at six in the morning, so that idea is out of the question. Then she tells me that I need to get it done the very next day that I return. Hmm … I sense urgency. I ask her straight out, “Is it that serious?” She reassures me that it isn’t that serious, even though she is pushing for an appointment.
Anyhow, off I go on my vacation. It was a great vacation! But that’s for another article. However, every now and then, while enjoying my vacation, I start to think, I might have cancer!
Good grief! I have brittle bone disease, broken my bones over one hundred times, I have had two bouts of pneumonia and one almost killed me. Let’s see, what else has happened to me? Oh yeah, I am in a wheelchair and forever will be in one, with other numerous medical problems that I don’t wish to share with the world, and on top of that, on top of that, I might have cancer?
Nice! Real nice!
Later on, I find out that the doctor is referring me to another doctor because the other doctor has a “special” chair. One that swivels! Oh lucky me!
I guess this is the fun part of the medical world where we have to play duck, duck, goose with our medical files, doctors, secretaries, and appointment dates. Tomorrow I will find out when I will see the doctor for the procedure. But in the meantime, I was told that I might have to wait until September for the procedure.
I ask the lady at the other doctor’s office if that means that it must not be cancerous since all of them were willing to wait from June to September. She says she doesn’t know. I said, “Find out!” I don’t intend to sit here and wait around. Believe or not, tomorrow, July 9th, I might have an appointment for this procedure before the year runs out!
Oh the joys!
My sisters don’t stop thinking about it. My friends are telling me what every good friend is supposed to say at a time like this—“Oh, it’s nothing!” But it can’t be nothing. It has to be something or else it’s wasted time.
I write this in the hopes that whether the results are positive or negative, I can refer back to this article and realize that it really wasn’t “nothing.”
Death is not a topic that we shy away from at Audacitymagazine.com, so I feel comfortable sharing with all of you my thoughts during these past several weeks. You see, living with Osteogenesis Imperfecta, I have seen others with my disability die of respiratory issues and other complications. I have seen others with different disabilities die because of their disability, and I have seen able-bodied people die due to life circumstances.
I have always thought that I must live my life as if it were my last. That doesn’t mean that I am going to jump out of an airplane or go bungee jumping, but it does mean that I need to refocus on the ideas, values, and people who are important to me.
How many of you have spent time with someone who never appreciated your kindness, your love, your time, and your special qualities?
Yeah, I am sure many of us fall into that category. So that is what I want to take from this can be or cannot be cancer scare. I want to prune the people around me.
Recently, I was told that I am too nice. That I do too much for people when I care about them. Lately, I have seen the evidence of this, even though I really would like to ignore it. But if I stick to my philosophy that I should treat each day as if it were my last, then why surround myself with people who have no problem taking advantage of my kindness?
These past two months, I have received emails from women who are not happy with their men. Most of them have a central theme. They don’t feel appreciated or they feel taken advantage of, or they feel rejected.
So let’s put this into perspective—why be with that person? If you only have x amount of time on earth, why be with someone who knocks on your door because he wants something? Don’t open that door! Why make someone feel special if they are not willing to do the same for you? Romantic relationship or not, you are not someone’s entertainment tool when he/she is bored or wants something from you.
I didn’t say it was easy. But it can be done. So if I have to gain something from this medical scare, it’s that I must continue to walk the walk and live as I speak. Remove those around me who waste my time or make me feel bad. Life isn’t supposed to be that way. No matter how many years we have on it.
Oh, there is one more thing—appreciate the ones you love because you never know! Until next time, when we find out how much fun I had on the doctor’s “special” chair …