Deep Breath: Mercury Is in Retrograde

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The last time Mercury was in retrograde, my internet inexplicably stopped working and I somehow managed to lock the dog in the other room—without a key— all the while the plumber was performing $200 worth of CPR on my clogged kitchen sink.
 
If you’ve been experiencing more than a little chaos since last week, now you know why. Through November 26, Mercury will pass the Earth in its orbit, seemingly in reverse—otherwise known as retrograde. Otherwise known as TOTAL CHAOS. At least in the communication, organization and detail-oriented departments. So basically everything. For those of you who don’t believe in planetary hocus pocus, please just take my word for it and cross your Ts and dot your Is, avoid any major changes or new undertakings, and triple check your emails before hitting Reply All.
 
But all is not lost! According to my go-to astrology advisors, the Astro Twins, on Wednesday, communicator Mercury moves back into Scorpio, at which time we’ll find ourselves “sorting through secrets, dealing with power struggles, and trying to crack the case on unsolved mysteries. Life could get a little CSI right now for us all. Keep confidential information under lock and key and avoid getting swept up in dangerous liaisons. Private matters have a way of becoming public if we aren’t careful during Mercury retrogrades.”
 
Here’s to moving forward, not backward in the weeks ahead. May the force be with you all! 
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